Is it okay to ask God “why”? I am very familiar with the belief that asking God “why” indicates a lack of faith and trust. It shouldn’t be allowed and worse, if you do ask, then you should be condemned or ostracized by others. I couldn’t disagree more.
Are you questioning your suffering right now? Are you questioning the pain? I believe it is okay to ask God the big “why” questions. He certainly is big enough and secure enough as God to handle your doubts. I do caution you though. Be on guard as to where the questioning leads. Does it lead towards God or away from Him?
I have experienced both cases in my life. There were times when I was begging for answers in order to make sense of the suffering; to try to wrap my brain around the pain. My asking and pleading for answers led me towards God. I chose to trust even when I didn’t understand. The questions led me into the arms of Jesus as I sought refuge and strength in Him. As a result, I rarely heard answers to my questions, but I was held by Jesus as He strengthened and encouraged me.
I have also allowed my questions to take me away from God. My questions led to doubts, which led to a refusal to trust Christ because I didn’t understand my circumstances. This is a dangerous place to be indeed. When I allowed my faith to grow cold and I stopped trusting, I became desperate for answers in other places, all of which were false. I lost the anchor of my soul, Jesus. I lost all ability to endure and maintain hope. I lost my strength; I lost my peace. I become a solitary wanderer in a dark land, prowling with monsters waiting to devour me. I do not recommend this course.
I encourage you that it is okay to ask God “why”. I also encourage you to not lose faith when you hear silence. God is not obligated to explain His perfect, infinite, eternal plans to us. We wouldn’t be able to grasp them anyway. Be okay with the silence (this is not easy, I know!). Don’t allow that silence to cause doubts that God doesn’t love you, He doesn’t care or that life has suddenly and unexpectedly spiraled beyond His control. Don’t allow the silence to break your faith and sever the crucial anchor between you and Jesus. Hold onto Him. Cling to Him. One day, perhaps only in eternity, all will be made plain. Until then, determine to trust Him, no matter what!
I want to add one more thought. There were times I didn't trust and I lost my faith to hold onto Jesus. For those who have also experienced those times, remember God's grace! Following Jesus isn't a matter of how well we perform or how well we maintain our faith. Faith is about Who Jesus Christ is and His love for His children and His enduring faithfulness. If you find yourself lost, seeking a way to grasp onto Jesus again, simply ask Him. You will realize that He has been holding you the whole time.